THANKFUL FOR A MODERN DAY THANKSGIVING

Charles Dickens penned, “Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has many – not your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.”

 The media often magnifies the doom and gloom of our societal issues and forecasts more hardship ahead. However, things aren’t ever as bleak as some would have us believe.

I say rebel against pessimism!  Let’s reflect and be contented with our bounty this Thanksgiving. From medicine to microwaves, modern conveniences have allowed us to live longer, work less, and have more time for leisure. We have come a very long way since the first Thanksgiving feast almost four hundred years ago!

It all started in the fall of 1621. The Plymouth colonist (Pilgrims) gathered to give thanks for their first harvest and for surviving their first dreadful winter in Massachusetts. And it was dreadful! Two or three Pilgrims died every day during the first two months they were in Plymouth. Four entire families were taken. Thirteen of the eighteen women died. There were no preventative flu shots, fever reducers, cough medicines, or hospitals to isolate and care for the sick.

The fortunate survivors were greatly aided by their newfound Indian friends. Many argue none would have survived without their help. It would be many years before the great friendship between the white European and the Indians would end.

Kids were not playing video games, watching TV, or texting their friends. Children as young as five worked from sunrise to sunset fetching wood, gathering water, and herding geese. Older children worked in the fields, harvesting and fertilizing new crops. Teenage boys helped with plowing and hunting while teenage girls took care of the infants, sewed, and cooked meals.

Pilgrim parents constantly corrected and disciplined their children. They thought the Native people were too lenient with their young.

If that’s not enough to make your kids fall to their knees in gratitude, tell them this. Both girls and boys wore dresses – full length dresses called gowns. And, they didn’t throw them in the washer and dryer after a hard days work. When they laundry, which was not very often, it was in a bucket of cold salt water.

Today many families celebrate Thanksgiving watching football and eating heaps of delicious food. Why not include some appreciative reflection. One way is to join the family together and create a thankful paper chain. It’s super easy. Just cut out strips of paper and connect them together as loops. 

Before linking them, write a grateful note on each. Brainstorm all the luxuries of modern life before having the kids write theirs. Once it’s finished, color it, glitter it up, and hang it over the door, or on the Christmas tree for a decorative reminder of our blessings.

I hope you and your family enjoyed a thankful, blessed Thanksgiving with all the trimmings and trappings of a modern day feast!

Contact Margaret Lavin at elementarydays@gmail.com.

THANKFUL FOR REAL ROLE MODELS

Because of so-called reality shows that promote sex and selfishness and because of moronic pop stars like, Justin Bieber, Miley Cyrus, and the Kardashians, I began to wonder, are youth today under the impression that these VIP impersonators are good role models? Could our sweet students discern the difference between true role models – hardworking parents, heroic firefighters, and our men and women in uniform - and the phony media-made caricatures that we are venerated on social media. 

I decided to conduct my own, very limited and informal research. I asked 30 eighth graders who they thought were good role models and I delightfully discovered that these kids got it! They know these false icons are not representative of their world. When asked who they look up to, not one tween chose a pretentious personality. Most chose their mom, dad or a sibling. All chose outstanding individuals with traits such as athleticism, helpfulness, and kindness. For example:

Kyle’s role model is his mom. “She is a preschool teacher and also has an engineering degree. I admire her for finding ways to solve problems that no one else can solve. She has managed to support us by herself. She is self-sacrificing, kind and brave.

Brittany has a number of role models but she “…aspires to be like Kate. Kate is in high school. She is an amazing soccer player, a great friend, and goes to church regularly.”

AnneMarie’s role model is Jenny Finch. “She was a softball player at Arizona State and went on to play for Team USA and she won many medals…I also admire her because she tries to be the best athlete she can be. She spends a lot of time helping children who can’t always afford to play softball.”

A young man of few words, Dominic, chose Albert Einstein. “He was a scientist. He was very smart. He helped us win World War II.

James selected his basketball coach. “He is extra special because he doesn’t do anything bad, like steal, smoke, or get into fights.”

Justin wrote pages about his brother Jason. “He has received athletic honors in basketball and track…He is also a very talented artist…He is very modest about the things he does. Besides being an athlete, he’s a great brother. He is kind and very soft spoken. Even though we fight a lot, there are more good times than bad. And at the end of the day, he is still my hero and role model.”

These young scholars have the sagacity to distinguish between true heroes and anti-ones. They remain optimistic and conscientious. Perhaps the media’s next reality star should not be an undernourished model or an immature washout from Jersey Shore. Perhaps the next reality show should be based on real heroes like Jason’s brother, Kyle’s mom or any number of hardworking parents who toil daily to make ends meat while reaming exemplars for their children.

Contact Margaret Lavin at elementarydays@gmail.com.

HALLOWEEN FACTS AND FICTION

Soon, ghost and goblins will be playing tricks and eating treats, prancing down neighborhood streets and causing chaotic fun with family and friends. Parents may have some apprehension about letting their little witches and warlocks roam the night because of the continual retelling of myths and urban legends surrounding Halloween.

Reports of razor blades hidden in apples and candy have been haunting parents for decades. These ridiculous and malicious rumors have caused many people to ban trick-or-treating and stop handing out candy treats altogether. The sad fact is the only cases of tampered-candy killing children on Halloween were of relatives poisoning family members on purpose.

I remember my own mom dumping our pillowcases of candy on the kitchen floor, putting on her gardening gloves and meticulously fanning the loot across the tile. She knelt over mini candy bars and popcorn balls, searching for evidence of tampered treats. Inevitably she threw out two or three pieces. I suspect now it was to assure herself that her efforts were not in vain.

Another common and misguided belief is that excess consumption of sugar-laden candy will make kids hyperactive. We can all agree that devouring mounds of sugar is not good for any of us. Candy is nothing but empty calories and eating too much can lead to bad eating habits, dental cavities and health issues. However, after countless studies, the American Medical Association has found that sugar in the diet does not affect children’s behavior. Most likely it’s not the sweets but the situation that causes kids to throw caution and parental imperatives to the wind.

While the sadistic tales of evil people poisoning our sugar-crazed kids are false, there are some real dangers that can easily be avoided.

We should be concerned about motor vehicle accidents. Roughly four times as many children aged 5-14 are killed while walking on Halloween evening compared with other evenings of the year.

Make sure drivers can see your child and vice versa. Give kids flashlights and glow sticks. Also, use makeup rather than masks so children have a clear, unobstructed view of their surroundings. Young trick-or-treaters should be accompanied by an adult and all should know to only cross at the crosswalks and stay on the sidewalk.

Nearly 6 million or 8% of children have food allergies. To be safe, hand out treats that are free of dairy, wheat and eggs - the most common food allergens. Some options include: Smarties, gum, mints, hard candy or jellybeans. Consider handing out trinkets such as stickers, pencils or coins. Enforce a ‘no eating while trick-or-treating’ policy and pass on candy and treats that do not have ingredients labeled.

To avoid eye injuries, cuts and bruises, use costume knives and swords that are flexible, not rigid or sharp and make sure children can walk comfortably in their costume.

 

Don’t worry about unknown or unfounded dangers. Instead, eat, drink and be scary while taking a few precautions to protect your children from the easily averted hazards.

           

Contact Margaret Lavin at elementarydays@gmail.com.

A HAPPY NEW YEAR FOR THE KIDS

Trying to maintain happiness isn’t something new. Socrates attempted to define it, linking happiness to knowledge. Our Declaration of Independence gives us the right to pursue it and thousands of books have been written on how to obtain it, like, “The Art of Happiness: A Handbook for Living” by Dalai Lama and, “Climb Your Stairway to Heaven: The 9 Habits of Maximum Happiness” by David Leonhardt. We are obsessed with it, and it’s not a coincidence.

 

Researchers have found that happy people are more likely to have stronger immune systems, live longer, have better relationships, are more satisfied with work, have less depression and greater copying skills. 

Seems like a no-brainer to encourage our children to be happy, but how? I have found that happy students directly correlate to my own happiness as a teacher, so I have tried very hard over the years to keep my class in high spirits. Here are three sure-fire ways that have worked in my classroom and may work for you at home.

Praise

My teaching motto is “praise early and often.” I find if I give compliments generously and specifically, I have better management and many more smiles. Kids, even in middle school, adore gold stars for good behavior, happy face stickers on their homework and pats on their back for work well done. Many of my colleagues have adapted a similar creed, giving  “two compliments for every criticism.” You may want to up that ratio.

I also praise everyday accomplishments as well as the exceptional ones and scaffold my praise depending on student’s demeanor and academic standing. For example, some students receive praise for doing extra credit; others receive a commendation for making it to class on time.

Role Model

There are days I don’t feel like cheerily welcoming my students, but I fake it. I fake it for their sake as well as my own. When I’m happy, my students are happier, and when I’m cranky, for whatever reason, class can become a management nightmare. Students quickly become unresponsive and/or disruptive. So, if you’ve had a miserable day, conjure up a wonderful memory, plaster on a smile and try to fake your way to a harmonious night with the kids.

Eat and Sleep Well

Sleep, proper nourishment and happiness are highly connected. I know if I’m hungry, nothing else matters. Making sure kids eat something for breakfast and go to bed at a decent hour will help them focus in school which will lead to better grades, higher self-esteem and, you guessed it, more happiness.

Benjamin Franklin quipped, “The Constitution only guarantees the American people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.”  Let this year’s resolution be catching some happiness and radiating it to the kids!

Contact Margaret Lavin at elementarydays@gmail.com.

SLEEP IS ESSENTIAL

Over the lazy summer months it was easy to slack off on bedtime rituals. I am certainly guilty of postponing my tweens bedtime in hopes of thwarting her inevitable grumblings. Since school has started, however, I have become a drill sergeant at bedtime, barking orders of, “brush, book, and bed!” 

 

As difficult as it is to ignore my drowsy darling’s protests as she marches toward inevitable slumber, I feel justified knowing that poor sleep is among the most definitive causes of poor academic achievements. Children’s brains are still developing until the age of 21 and much of that development is done while they sleep. Research by the National Sleep Foundation shows that children who don’t get enough sleep get lower grades and have difficulty paying attention in class. The good news is the converse is also true. Getting a good night’s sleep improves memory, grades and athletic ability. It spurs creativity and lowers stress.

One significant deterrent to sleep is electronic devices. There are a plethora of studies concluding that electronic devices negatively affect sleep. Specifically, evening exposure to bright light, inherent in most electronic media devices, delays the circadian rhythm, your body’s internal clock, and suppresses melatonin, the chemical that helps regulate your sleep patterns – a good reason to get kids out of cyberspace and get them into bed!

 

If you’re having a tough time convincing your tweens and teens to go to bed at a decent hour, appeal to their developing self awareness. Let them know that too little sleep wreaks havoc on appearances. When young adults miss out on valuable and regenerative sleep, their blood vessels dilate which is why they may notice puffy dark circles under their eyes. Even one late night can actually increase pimples and acne breakouts.

Sleep deprivation can also cause weight gain. Sleep-deprived people have higher levels of ghrelin - a hormone that drives appetite. According to Dr. Plamen D. Penev, an Assistant Professor of Medicine at the University of Chicago “If [people] are not getting enough sleep as they diet, they may have higher levels of hunger and be struggling to adhere to the regimen.”

 

Now that everyone is convinced of the importance of a good night’s sleep, it’s time to put our good intentions to action. Try to wind up homework, extra-curricular activities and dinner by early evening. It’s really smart to remove computers, cell phones, and video games from the bedroom when it’s time to hit the hay. Figure out bedtimes by counting backwards at least 10 hours from when the kids need to wakeup. According to The American Academy of Sleep Medicine, school aged kids need 10 to 11 hours of sleep a day.

Modeling good bedtime routines are a win for kids and parents alike. Perhaps American author and Nobel Prize winner John Steinbeck said it best. “It is a common experience that a problem difficult at night is resolved in the morning after the committee of sleep has worked on it.

Let’s face it, getting a good night’s sleep is a no- brainer!

Contact Margaret Lavin at elementarydays@gmail.com.

GET TO KNOW THE GAMING COMMUNITY

The virtual world of online gaming has never been a part of my world, but I’m very aware that for kids, gaming communities are omnipresent and parents would be remiss to ignore their benefits as well as their potential hazards. On the bright side, children can exercise important life skills while gaming. They employ their imaginations and use problem-solving strategies while practicing social skills. However, there can be a dark side. Cyber-bullying is very real and very dangerous. Children can also have interactions with strangers, or even real-world predators.

Parent involvement is critical. So, if your children are running amuck in cyber-space, it’s time to grab the cyber-bull by the horns and get engaged with the gaming community. Here’s one way to get started close to home.

Its important to know which gaming communities your child plays in and which safety features are available on the gaming equipment. For example, some headsets have voice-masking features. Keep gaming consoles in an easy-to-supervise location and know that your child may have access to games in other places. Most cell phones today have Internet access. Tell your children and continually remind them never to give out personal information while gaming or agree to meet anyone outside of the game. You can research games’ ratings and content on the Entertainment Software Rating Board website, www.esrb.org.

Once you feel more comfortable in your knowledge of gaming and gamers, start a discussion with your children. The more often you talk with them about online safety, the more responsive they will become. Find out what kinds of people they play with and how much do other online gamers know about them. The best way to find out exactly what’s going on in your child’s cyber-world is to play the games with them. While playing, you can role-play how to respond if someone bothers you and get to know the type of players who are online and ways in which they interact.

Parenting tech-savvy kids can be intimidating, especially if, like me, you didn’t grow up with the same technologies. However, with a little hands-on learning and safety resources, you can protect your children from the potential dangers of online gaming communities. You may even find you like being a resident!

Contact Margaret Lavin at elementarydays@gmail.com.

WHY CHARTER SCHOOLS DON'T WORK

Educational historian and former assistant secretary of education, Diane Ravitch,  was once a proponent of charter schools and wrote books and articles making their case. However, in her book, The Death and Life of the Great American School System: How Testing and Choice Are Undermining Education,  she explained why she has changed her mind. “Given the weight of the studies, evaluations and federal test data, I concluded that deregulations and privately managed charter schools were not the answer to the deep-seated problems of America education…Charter schools, privately run but publicly funded, cherry-pick a neighborhood’s best students and kick out under-performers, forcing surrounding public schools to teach a depleted talent pool.”

Charter schools, for the most part, are publicly funded schools that are annulled from the rules, regulations, and statutes that apply to traditional public schools. They operate under a written contract, or charter. These contracts specify how the school will be held accountable for improved achievement. Their design suggests that if they improve students’ achievement, their contracts will be renewed. Those that do not will be closed. Sounds great, however, as it stands, only a tiny percentage of charters have been shut down, and those overwhelmingly had their charter terminated based on misspent money, not student performance. According to a study for the U.S. Dept of Education, “Charter schools rarely face sanctions.”

The movement toward charter schools is expanding despite the absence of accountability. There is no strong or convincing evidence that charter schools have improved student achievement or that they are being held more accountable for academic outcomes than regular public schools. Charter school proponents point to a 2003 study by the RAND Corporation as evidence of success. It concluded that charter school students in California “…are keeping pace with comparable students in conventional schools.” This is not an endorsement. Indeed, given the promise to raise achievement, this statistic reflects failure.

In fact, a national study conducted by Stanford University economist Margaret Raymond found that 37% of charter schools got worse results than comparable neighborhood public schools, 46% did about the same and only 17% were superior to public schools. Raymond surmised, “if this study shows anything, it shows we’ve got a 2 to 1 margin of bad charters to good charters.”

California Charter School Association claims that California charter schools “get results because they are highly responsive to students needs, do a better job increasing student achievement and demonstrate commitment to quality standards.” This type of propaganda is nothing but a marketing tool. As consumers we are bombarded daily with astonishing declarations about products and services. We are weary from deciphering the snake oils from the real McCoys. Marketing schools in this way is turning education into a commercial transaction, rather than a democratic ideal.

I understand the public’s frustration with traditional public schools, and as an education and a mother I strongly seek better results from our educational system. Charter schools, however, are not the answer. They have been a costly venture on an unproven alternative while cutting public school resources - resources we have paid for.

Contact Margaret Lavin at elementarydays@gmail.com.